It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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