Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
