And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
