i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
