He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
