Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
