her vagine was all disorganized.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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