My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize