so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
