dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
