we have officially lost it.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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