So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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