She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Damn victory sex feels great
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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