I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
