Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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