So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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