dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
