yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
