I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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