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You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
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