So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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