I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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