kristin has been a bad kristin
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
handjob tips. give me some.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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