i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
third nipple confirmed
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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