ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
