We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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