white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
