It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
