proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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