Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
