I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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