3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
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This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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