I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize