glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
