Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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