worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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