cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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