i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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