i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
did i walk over a car last night?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Randomize
