I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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