You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
