is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
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Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
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Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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