I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
