Texts From Last Night

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  (251): View more from Alabama

  i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.

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  (251): i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night. http://tfl.nu/skue
  Replies (20) Good night (530) Bad night (3716)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.

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  (918): The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners. http://tfl.nu/k8de
  Replies (7) Good night (657) Bad night (3750)
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  (925): View more from California

  Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.

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  (925): Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor. http://tfl.nu/43q5
  Replies (24) Good night (5231) Bad night (1499)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .

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  (201): we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is . http://tfl.nu/3c24
  Replies (43) Good night (8048) Bad night (1070)
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  (518): View more from New York

  4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.

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  (518): 4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens. http://tfl.nu/m8yq
  Replies (55) Good night (10654) Bad night (3181)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.

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  (678): I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom. http://tfl.nu/95nr
  Replies (18) Good night (2101) Bad night (3982)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas

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  (401): Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas http://tfl.nu/kaq5
  Replies (1) Good night (1624) Bad night (958)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire

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  (419): On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire http://tfl.nu/uiq5
  Replies (4) Good night (1185) Bad night (1066)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.

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  (812): And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god. http://tfl.nu/4xu8
  Replies (3) Good night (1171) Bad night (891)
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  (646): View more from New York

  I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.

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  (646): I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands. http://tfl.nu/f9cd
  Replies (2) Good night (612) Bad night (854)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.

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  (763): I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously. http://tfl.nu/s4km
  Replies (1) Good night (328) Bad night (576)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.

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  (920): She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls. http://tfl.nu/7oj4
  Replies (2) Good night (638) Bad night (310)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.

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  (610): I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four. http://tfl.nu/hflm
  Replies (0) Good night (365) Bad night (584)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.

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  (701): Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy. http://tfl.nu/7jm2
  Replies (2) Good night (249) Bad night (693)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.

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  (734): I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it. http://tfl.nu/2rrt
  Replies (3) Good night (466) Bad night (175)

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