Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED