Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride http://tfl.nu/qcn3
  Replies (6) Good night (548) Bad night (2607)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  im about as happy as oj after his trial

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): im about as happy as oj after his trial http://tfl.nu/g9i1
  Replies (20) Good night (2526) Bad night (590)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me... http://tfl.nu/3wpt
  Replies (18) Good night (1387) Bad night (6608)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case" http://tfl.nu/zxvf
  Replies (15) Good night (4503) Bad night (3979)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car.. http://tfl.nu/jqo1
  Replies (5) Good night (670) Bad night (2981)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze. http://tfl.nu/rdoy
  Replies (3) Good night (840) Bad night (1171)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution http://tfl.nu/2azu
  Replies (3) Good night (1120) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste' http://tfl.nu/jrl8
  Replies (11) Good night (1913) Bad night (527)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in. http://tfl.nu/p4v5
  Replies (0) Good night (383) Bad night (228)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him http://tfl.nu/pxxc
  Replies (5) Good night (652) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying. http://tfl.nu/eu3f
  Replies (6) Good night (937) Bad night (228)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay http://tfl.nu/przh
  Replies (4) Good night (306) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Maybe for her....

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Her problem, not mine

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA? (1-775): Maybe for her.... (775): Her problem, not mine http://tfl.nu/f1v7
  Replies (1) Good night (760) Bad night (231)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum. http://tfl.nu/q7aq
  Replies (0) Good night (492) Bad night (246)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it. http://tfl.nu/c71w
  Replies (3) Good night (568) Bad night (290)

Randomize