I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i want to swaddle you in tequila
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
