5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
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It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
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I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
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