My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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