I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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