She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
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He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
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I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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