bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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